Stage IIIa means it has spread to the top of the vagina but not the pelvic wall.
At this stage, it is usually treated with radiation and chemotherapy. You did not mention her treatment.
If she knows what stage her cancer is, then she is seeing an oncologist, and the oncologist should be giving her something for her pain.
I did not answer this because I knew much about cervical cancer, but because I had a close friend who died of cancer a couple of years ago, and your question about what to do to help her is something I can address.
The need to try to do something when a friend is that sick is almost universal, and it is almost a desperate feeling. Please do not go too far or push too hard. Ask her if it would help her if you did x. Don't tell her you are going to do it.
You can offer to do housework, drive her to doctor, look up information about her condition, find her a support group, run errands, etc.
When my friend was on chemotherapy and started losing her hair, I went all over the internet and found hats designed especially for women who are losing hair. I bought about four of them, different styles. I know she liked them because she modeled them for other friends.
When the chemotherapy made a bunch of different foods taste so bad she could hardly eat (she couldn't stand potatoes), and she started dropping weight rapidly, I started making big batches of soup with meat and beans in them, leaving out the spices. I knew she needed protein. I froze them in serving sizes in freezer bags and gave them to her. She liked them. She gained weight. She even served them to other visitors. When she told me she liked ice cream, I got some ideas of her favorite flavors and made some for her myself.
I heard someone on TV say that Trident cinnamon gum takes the bad taste out of your mouth from chemotherapy, so I bought her some. It worked for her and she kept buying it after that.
A mutual friend told me he was desperate to help her, so I told him she was having problems keeping anything on her stomach, and that his stash of marijuana might have some use. He got in his car immediately and drove 40 miles to deliver it. She used it until she could get a prescription for it (we are in California where you can do that).
Your friend is not my friend, and may have entirely different needs. I just want to get you to thinking about what you can do for her.
One other thing. Did you ever see "Terms of Endearment," where the mother screamed in the hospital for pain medication for her daughter? People who are sick sometimes need somebody else to be firm with a doctor. If you don't think she is getting appropriate medication for pain or anything else, it may help if you go with her to the doctor. Only if she wants you to.
I hope all goes well with your friend.
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